5 Online Dating Tips For Women By Nina Agdal

There I was making a delicious Simple Single Man Meal™ when I then hear a notification on my phone go off. The sound indicates a potential hook-up from Tinder.

Wonderful, another woman has fallen victim of my mass-swiping technique. Let’s check this broad out:

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Wow! It’s none other then 24 year old world famous Danish super model, and future mother of my many children, Nina Agdal.

Could this be true? Could this be real?

Absolutely not. Just another ad. Let’s see what she’s selling:

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Nice copywriting, Nina.

Best dating tips you say, well let’s check them out and see how good they are.

5 Online Dating Tips For Women By Nina Agdal

Tip #1: Wear a bright color in your profile pic to stand out.

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Nina, I must say, that mustard shirt really brings out your tits eyes. Good on ya.

Peacocks (the male peafowl) are usually the ones showing their feathers to court peahens (the female peafowl). But don’t let that fowl patriarchy hold you down!

Show some color!

Tip #2: Smile! Not smiling in your profile pic reduces your chances for a right swipe.

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Nina, I couldn’t agree with you more. About %50 of the women I see on Tinder aren’t smiling. What gives?

Are these women that don’t smile trying look rough and tough? Do these women think we like that? Do some guys like that? I’ve never heard a dude say, “Omg D, her grimace is such a turn on! Her wry amusement makes me feel kind of funny in the pants.”

Also, good call Nina, that mustard shirt looks better around your waist. You should show more skin.

Tip #3: Include a bio in you profile to help start the converstations.

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It’s amazing how little info we guys have to work with when it comes to online dating profiles. Ladies, if you just have pictures of you and your friends, and no bio, it’s kind of hard to start the conversation. And we all know you gals aren’t the ones usually making the first move.

A link to your Instagram or Snapchat account doesn’t count. All that tells me is that you’re just a social media horder.

But, then again, that could be your way of filtering out the losers. The guys that add you to all that shit are probably pussies. In that case, very clever ladies, very clever.

But seriously, put something of substance in your profile bio.

Tip #4: 60% of singles prefer an evening date.

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Why do you think that is Nina? I’d like to think it’s because singles have shit to do in the day time – like work or school – like I do. But I think it’s because another reason: so they can drink they’re faces off.

There’s something about the night time that brings out peoples darker sides and an excuse to lower inhibitions, especally when drinking.

A caveat to that: summer is coming so patio drinking is upon us. I bet that 60% may drop closer to half in the coming months.

Tip #5: Most singles prefer the clean shaven look for guys.

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Nina, I’m not sure I totally agree with you on this one. I’ve had women compliment my manly mane and also my clean shaven countenance.

Which brings me to believe women don’t know what they want. But Nina, you already knew that.


Let’s recap:

5 Online Dating Tips For Women By Nina Agdal
  1. Wear bright colors in your profile pic, because evolution says so
  2. Smile, because nobody likes a Debbie Downer
  3. Include a bio in your profile, becuase we can’t read you goddamn mind, give us something to work with
  4. Suggest a date at night, because people usually have their nights open to getting down and drity
  5. Shave your face, because no woman likes a nu-male faux-beard

Nina, thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule to help fellow gals out with the roller coaster ride that is the currect dating market. You’re doing us a great service.

And now, why we all clicked the link to read this post, some pictures of Nina:

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