This is Part VIII of The D Live Culture Series
Tinder is now available on Apple TV. Why you might ask? I thought the same thing.
I’m still trying to figure that one out. In the mean time, lets have some fun with these silly people.
Invite friends and family
Yes, because my friends and family don’t have anything to do with their time other then sit around while I ogle over woman I’ll never fuck.
put out the chips and dip
That’s actually a good idea. You have to remember to be a good host while sharing your Tinder experience with your loved ones. They need to keep their energy up while you arrange dates with single moms that ride horses and have a giant German Sheppard and their grandpa in their profile pic.
How else are you supposed to know she’s adventurous, is an animal lover, and loves her Papa? Ya, I couldn’t think of another way either.
We’ve combined all the joys of swiping with all the comforts of your home
Wrong! You missed one: swiping on the shitter. There’s nothing more joyous than dropping a huge deuce while reading yet another profile that says, “Not looking for hookups, I’m so over that!”
Hey, she seems like a keeper! (*plop*)
Next, here are some promotional ads that Tinder and Apple put together. And let me tell you, they sure are revealing.
She’s Not Good Enough for My Boy!
Hey Ma! Get the hell outta here so I can find a chubby 6 and get a handjob, on your couch, cuz I’m unemployed!
Now in the comfort of your own home (or your parents) you can find, “The One” on a TV, in all its 70inch HD-4K-3D glory.
Shut up Dad! Don’t you slut shame me!
Now you and your bff can look for bad boys to, “just take you” on that gross 1970s couch.
He’ll probably never call you again.
(PS – I’d be careful on that couch, your brother was using it the other day, eww.)
Um Mom, I could really use a Dad, you know, since I wasn’t raised with a father figu…..okay I’ll shut up.
Even boomin’ granny can find herself some weathered Alpha cock.
There are a bunch of these videos. Check the rest of them out here.
As long as stuff like this keeps becoming the norm, I will have lots of things to write about for The D Live Culture Series. Keep ‘em coming!